Just guess

Speaking of acclimatization, consider this the first AND last time I will ever offer to pay the electricity bill for my subleasers. Thanks to the beauty of e-billing, I’ve been  getting these nifty (and torturous) updates on my tenants’ kilowatt usage in my absence. Now, I’m not going to give you too many hints, but can you [...]

Acclimatization

You know you’re adapting to life in the Southwest when you’re disappointed on the days it doesn’t storm like a mofo.  For those unaware, we are knee-deep in monsoon season out here, which means that things like a pizza delivery man getting caught in a torrent of floodwaters make the nightly news, which is silly because it [...]

You are what you eat

My friend Zoe just sent me this link with the caption “this is funny.” Indeed, Zo, indeed.
Carnivore sex off the menu
You know, that reminds me.
I actually worked for a vegan woman who once told me that she thought the reason her past partners had been so forthcoming with cunnilingus was because she “tasted better.” Which [...]

Best pep talk ever

Last night I was lamenting to my friend Katie about how uninspired I’ve been by some of the guys I’ve talked to as of late. In particular, one guy who says he’ll call and then doesn’t and whose next move after he’s not called is to send a text message that says “hey you” and [...]

Pardon me

Do you think the vegan police will forgive a girl if she realizes that, after stuffing her mouth full of it, her delicious breakfast granola is studded not just with cranberries, pecans, and flax seed, but also with maggots? Yeah, and here’s me caring if they do care. Suck it, vegan police. That granola was labelled as vegan. [...]

Righteous

Just as I’m leaving, Atlanta gets a specialized vegan shop: Cosmo’s Vegan Shoppe. To rub salt in the wound, it’s in walking distance to my old apartment and across the street from the coffee shop that employed me. Bummer. But yay for you guys!
Also, note the bestsellers. Number one? Glyde vegan condoms. Of course. I think I can just about picture the store’s core [...]

Why is “nonconformist” not a search option?

Friends, I am in need of a new messenger bag. The one I’ve used the last few years has been getting more and more broke-down over the course of the last year. I’ve taken it to a tailor twice to get the shoulder strap re-stitched. And then towards the end of last semester, the plastic part [...]

Too late

Cuteness!

Bite your tongue

I used to be very amused by pet owners who carried on full conversations with their pets. I mean, analytical conversations about their wishes, the pets’ wishes, and the general state of the world. One of these pet owners lived next door to me when I lived in Inman Park, and I regarded him with [...]

This just in

(to be read with great satire implied)
From now on, I am only taking friendship applications from those genetically programmed to be slender. Observe:
Obesity Contagious!
And also, if you are obese and my friend, consider this your warning.
And also, good Lord, this is some fascinating research with some terrifying implications. Here is my favorite quote:
“It also [...]