Paging Planet Earth

When your friend, in the midst of telling you about the guy she’s been dating, says, “we did it.” And then you respond with dead silence and then, “did what?” It might officially be time to pull your head out of the books and return to the world of the non-freaking-the-hell-out-about-their-Biostats-exam.
Then, after that, you can [...]

You’re Welcome. You’re Odd.

Yesterday, I received an envelope in the mail with the letterhead for an attorney in Arkansas. It was one of those envelopes that you glance at and immediately think “oh fuck, what the fuckety fuck is this?” Despite the fact that I’m one of the most straight-laced people I know, I immediately started scanning my mind for possible [...]

Check

I think it’s probably a bad sign when you start having to add a note to your to-do list to e-mail back the person you’ve been dating. Especially when you always add it to the very bottom.

Dear computer lab technician

Can I just make a recommendation? If you set-up  a bank of computers whose Auto-Recover function you have turned off, all the while disallowing public users from saving to the desktop (even though it totally looks like they are saving to the desktop), could you  NOT put the power strip to all those computers directly underfoot [...]

Please press “you suck”

A few weeks ago, I ran across a bread maker at a local thrift store that was selling for $4.99. I’ve wanted a bread maker for a while, because, you know, well…actually, I have no idea why. Just because. Because I want to stick it to the small local bakery who makes my whole grain bread? [...]

Now with even more attention whoring

Well, I was going to write this great little post that said simply: 
“I want rockabilly bangs. You can’t stop me. Don’t try.”
But then I went and caught a microbe of some sort and got all feverish and lethargic. And that’s on top of the feverish and lethargic one gets simply by virtue of living in the [...]

Happy Birthday, Eiður Smári Guðjohnsen!

Hey man, congrats on turning 29 today. Oh, and thanks for having such an awesome Icelandic name. Congrats too for your brief moment of fame on my blog, simply because you have the good fortune of having been born on the same day as me. Never mind your skills at “dribbling and close-control, combined with deadly finishing.” Wiki’s a fan of [...]

Today

Fourteen months ago, my niece Mackenzie died of leukemia. Today, she would have turned four. I might’ve bought her a tea set or some Dora the Explorer-branded thing and wrapped it in the pinkest wrapping paper I could find. Instead, I find myself Googling her name to see what ever came of the playground that [...]

Cause I think you’re kinda sweet

Let it just be said that I love Alicia Keys “You Don’t Know My Name.” And having been a waitress in a coffee shop, I feel like she wrote this song for me. And that part where she just straight up calls the man? Awesome. But here’s the thing…I’ve been wondering for YEARS how she [...]

Auto-fill is a trickster

Gmail has this great little function, whereby you start typing in the name of a dear, beloved friend, and it automatically fills in the person’s name and e-mail address, almost as if by magic. I tend to dash off e-mails in a hurry these days, so it’ s a real time saver. Often, I just [...]